Potty Training Pointers

Expert Advice on When and How To Potty Train Your Toddler

Potty training. Just those two words bring me back to a time of stress in the Jones household. Between deciding what age to start the process for each child and listening to “those parents” whose kids were potty trained before age 2...it’s enough to get my heart racing. Do we use candy to motivate her or will we be encouraging bad eating habits. Should we give her surprises such as toys or would we be spoiling her? For some real answers I talked to a local pediatrician and parents who have “been there, done that.”

When They’re Ready

Dr. Scott Chappell, pediatrician at Pediatric Partners of Augusta, says it is not recommended to start potty training until age 2, but if the child is ready, you can start earlier. “Signs that children are ready include asking to take the diaper off or telling parents they are dirty,” says Dr. Chappell. 

Candi Wingate, president of Nannies 4 Hire, says there are also other signs to look for such as:

• Staying dry for at least two hours at a time.
• Having regular bowel movements.
• Being able to follow instructions.
• Asking to use the potty or saying that they need to urinate or have a bowel movement.
• Showing interest in the toilet and/or wearing “big kid” underpants.

Dr. Chappell says that the parent should make the potty available as soon as the child shows interest.
Elizabeth Donsbach, mother of two young boys, started potty training her older son when he was about 3 years old. “He started showing interest about two weeks prior to his fourth birthday,” she says.

When They’re Not Ready

Just as there are signs that a child is ready for potty training there also are signs a child is not ready. When Donsbach began potty training her son she tried everything—bribes with candy and toys, making it a game with Cheerios on the toilet, watching videos, reading books and even letting him pick out his own reward at a local toy store. “Nothing worked until he decided he was ready,” she says. 
Dr. Chappell warns parents against pushing a not-ready child into potty training. “No one will ever be able to force a child to be potty trained,” he says. 
Wingate says parents should remember that the child has control of his bodily functions and you can’t get him to “go” on the potty until he is ready. “Don’t turn this into a power struggle because it is one you won’t win,” she adds.

Which Potty?

With so many different potty styles and seats in the stores today, how does a parent know which one to choose? 
“Children need a stable seat to sit on for pottying in the toilet,” says Dr. Chappell. Although he doesn’t endorse a specific product, he says in order to be able to have a BM, the child needs to be able to put his feet flat on something with the thighs parallel to the ground. 
Donsbach found that an inexpensive small seat with handles that fits on a regular toilet seat worked best for her son. She has one of these seats in every bathroom of the house along with a small stepstool so her son can put his feet on something firm.

Incentives or Not?

Donsbach discovered that candy and Matchbox cars were the key to her little boy’s success. “I gave him a piece of candy each time he urinated and two small pieces each time he had a BM,” she says. After 6 p.m., she would reward him with a Matchbox car for each trip to the potty instead of candy so close to bedtime. “Now he gets three matchbox cars a night if he hasn’t had any accidents all day,” she says.
Dr. Chappell recommends incentives (positive reinforcement) for potty training, but it needs to be immediate gratification. “It can’t be, ‘We’ll go to Target later,’” he says. As for the best incentives to use, Dr. Chappell says these are specific to each family and parents need to determine what their “currency” is. This can sometimes come down to negative reinforcement to get the job done, such as taking something away from the child to get him to go on the toilet.

Wingate recommends being supportive and using rewards such as stickers to encourage your child. She also suggests using praise, applause, songs and even reading a special book in the bathroom to get the job done. Another idea to create excitement is to let your child pick out his favorite themed big-boy underpants. “Also don’t begin toilet training during a stressful time,” says Wingate. This includes moving, having a new sibling, starting a new preschool, etc.

Every child is different so what works for one sibling may not work for the others. Some children potty train very easily while others take a little more time and effort, according to Wingate. “With your patience and encouragement, your child will (eventually) be potty trained,” she adds.

Cammie Jones is an Augusta freelance writer. She and her husband, David, have three young daughters.

Potty-Training Products and Incentives

• The On-the-Go Inflatable Potty Seat (onthegoinflatables.com) offers travel potty seats. Basically, they come in either blue or pink and can be bought individually ($7.99 each) or in packs of three ($17.99). They inflate easily, according to the Web site, and fit on standard toilet seats with a backrest for comfort.

• For older children who are having trouble staying dry at night, go to thebedwettingstore.com. The Bed Wetting Store sells potty pagers and offers a good book on staying dry at night, along with many other potty-training products,

• Pottytrainingconcepts.com is a site that has potty-training tips for girls and boys, potty seats (some are very unique), books, incentive sticker charts and even bed-wetting products. 

• The official 3-Day Potty Training program can be found at 3daypottytraining.com. This is an eBook that claims a child can be potty trained in just three days. 

• Parents.com offers many fun potty-training incentives including sticker charts, a journal your child can help decorate that shows her progress, wet/dry dolls, “going potty” books and even dye that turns the toilet water blue or pink to make going in the toilet a little more interesting.